im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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