He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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