her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I could fuck to npr.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize