I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
You don't make any sense
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