We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
