Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
