I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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