speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
