I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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