Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
