Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Randomize
