Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
