You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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