Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
