I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
