i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize