Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
