Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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