You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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