She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
