ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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