my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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