Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
