youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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