I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
