Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
