i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
