The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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