I'd wear matching sweaters with you
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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