I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
