everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
