community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
