I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
birth control should be required to get into college
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
