this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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