I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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