I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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