question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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