On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize