I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
