He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Be still, my beating vagina.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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