we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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