lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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