just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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