You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
