yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
