don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
