i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
