It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
