They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
