Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
